As the days pass along, I still morn the passing of my dad (resting in peace since 8/25). I have taken the past week to process all his belongings and flex them into my life. I am not going to say this has been the easiest task. All I want to do is have him here in my life. With all the heaviness, I have balanced it with some great moments! Inspiration to play outside has taken hold of me, two paddle boarding opportunities after work in the past week! Have endured great moments with friends, being there right when I needed them. Simple things, just hugs and presence of certain people. I feel so blessed by all the great gifts I have received! Have been making lattes every morning this week for the family, thanks for loving espresso dad!!
Another great moment? Taking the time after work to paint. My friend Tamara and I ventured off into some new unknown territory and hiked into a spot along the waters edge. We just let the moment lead us and we ended up in an estuary preserve.
One of my fathers long time friends wrote me a letter and said "he not only lived his life he invented it" about my dad. This quote sang to me so loud. I always say I should get the tattoo #makeithappen because sometimes we can get so caught up in our minds and never do things. Think too much. Well with my dad by my side, it felt good to get out there and paint. Take the opportunity. Invent the opportunity!
My painting sucks, I had a great painting in the beginning. I was really grooving along and enjoying it. Then I got caught up in the details in the background and ignoring the foreground. By the time I moved to the foreground I had to go back and adjust the background. The light was changing and moving more shadows in my bright areas. I couldn't get my pallete right. I just kept trying to move through it, laying more and more paint. Blah! I had to stop, it wasn't moving anywhere.
The beauty? I was out there, I was making it happen. Sometimes we don't need to focus on the end result, sometimes we just need to invent life as it is. Accept it for what it currently is giving us. (Tamara rocked her painting! Check it out!). Having failure is okay,that's what allows us to know when we have success. Sometimes our minds can be so fearful of the failure we forget to invent our life. So live it! Play in it! Make it happen. Invent it!